Mobile Phone Behaviors

phone.jpgJust a few brief bullet points on the ownership and usage of a mobile phone from a commuter’s point of view…

Your bluetooth headset may be very useful in a hands-free enviroment, but honestly, when you wear it like a cochlear implant gone horribly wrong you look like an unforgivable git. Trust me, it’s not cool, really. You look like you’re lost on the way to a Gene Roddenberry panel.

Although they are often small and easily overlooked on modern phones, the earpiece and microphone on your phone are usually very sensitive and efficient. You do NOT need to move the phone in front of your face and mouth to talk, then put it back against your ear to carry on a conversation. I call this particular maneuver the “World War II Radio Operator”. If you’re going to do it, you might as well start saying “Roger wilco, over and out” as well.

Walking around with your flip phone out in front of you even when you’re not using it doesn’t make you look important. It makes you look like you’ve deployed your phaser or you’re desperate for someone to call you. Trust me, if you’re really important folks will wait for extra 1-2 rings while you pull out your phone and open it. Buy a belt clip, they’re cheap.
Regardless of what rhinestone and hotglue manufacturers hope, your mobile phone is not a piece of jewelry. Wearing it around your neck on a lanyard only reinforces the concept that your phone is your leash. Sidenote: Doing the same with you iPod Nano MIGHT be acceptible from an excercise/workout point of view, but is a great way to invite a “snatch and grab” theft.

Finally, public areas are NOT your boardroom. Do not use your phone in speakerphone mode. I might accidentally say something that your caller might misinterpret. Oh say, regarding call girls, illegal drugs, etc. My bad! šŸ™‚

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2 Responses

  1. Lilisonna says:

    I maintain the the bluetooth headsets are merely paving the way for real cyberware. By the time that we’ve got working implanted datajacks, folks will be so adjusted to the metal-ear-gear that the jacks will look unobtrusive and normal.

  2. Mystech says:

    I maintain that said headsets are EXACTLY what the cybermen will use to control you… wait, that’s just a TV show. Replace “cybermen” with “Bush Administration”. Scarier and more realistic. šŸ™‚

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